Are you FUFIRE’d?

How do we know when we are in the FUFIRE phase of our FIRE journey? When I first discovered FI, I had my eye on the end prize of full financial independence. Mid journey, however, when circumstances in my life called for me to shake things up, be a pain in the ass, and push back, I realized that fear of losing my financial position was not a concern that had to be factored in. I realized, in this moment, how “free” I already was. That’s what I am trying to capture and share with you, so you are aware of the opportunities available to you, without the financial concerns impacting your options.


In order to know if you have enough FUnds for an FU ‘tude, consider the decisions you want to have the freedom to make. Let’s use my example:

For me, deciding if I had enough money to have the FU mindset took a little soul searching. It may be the same for you.

I weighed out some likely “what if” scenarios that I could come across where I would want to make sure I could hold my ground. 

  1. I want to take a dream job opportunity, but the pay is less.

  2. My supervisors pressure me to stop supporting the families I work with because of certain political influences.

  3. I get a paper in the mail tomorrow, calling me to court for a custody dispute.

First of all, I do NOT live my life based on fear of these concerns. I used to, and it held me back to a degree I can’t believe I allowed it to. We’ll get to that in another post. I do, however, acknowledge that certain issues within reason may come up, and I want to prepare for these scenarios. In this case, these questions I asked myself above are possible, likely, or reasonable to prepare for. 

So I ask:

Am I prepared to handle these circumstances? Can I hold my ground?

  • Can I take on a job that pays less if the opportunity arises?

  • Can I tell my supervisors NO, or resign if I must? 

  • Can I go to court, “lawyer up”, and hold my ground, paying the ridiculous fees that will arise?

Lastly, what is my answer to these questions?

YES, I can take less pay if I need to.

YES, I can be a pain in the ass at work and advocate for my families in need.

HELL YES, I can go to court and stand by what is right for my child.

When you can answer YES to the questions about these likely and reasonable concerns, then congratulations! You’re FUFIRE’d! 

Let’s not confuse this attitude with “I have money so you can’t tell me what to do!”, but rather, “I can decide, no matter how inconvenient or uncomfortable the ‘right’ thing to do is, that I will do it”. 

When it comes to answering the question, “Am I FUFIRE’d?”, a big component of this is the mentality, not just reaching a certain number. We aren’t just achieving a number and saying “DONE!” This FUFIRE phase is about the financial freedom journey AND benefiting from so many of the perks of a strong financial sounding.

Yes, keep your eye on your goal of being financially independent- but life doesn’t start then! Look around, savor your moments, and avoid the mentality of grinding through. For so many years, I felt stressed about work, and cringed when I had to have a conversation with my ex about anything parenting related. In those times, I told myself; “If I can just get through the next 10 years…”. When I finally faced things head on, I realized I had plenty of opportunity to live life on my own terms. I have been celebrating ever since.

This knowledge, in my back pocket, is what I take with me wherever I go. I probably will end up needing to use my FU attitude and/or FU Money in a completely unplanned scenario. I won’t compartmentalize these benefits to only pre-planned opportunities, but having some ideas of where I may need to hold my ground is a start. 

Where are you in this process?

More importantly, what can you gain from it?

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My Story: The Other Side of Fuck You Money